#i wish i cld. do more to help someway somehow in this world. for others. for you. but. i hate it i'm sorry i can't seem to do anything rn
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Visit Tumblr Blog
Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.
Last Seen Tumblr Blogs
Fun Fact
25% of US internet users with an annual income of $80-100K use Tumblr.
Text
i'll fix my account like tmrrw dw i'll be fine 🥹
evening has come again huh
#i need to do better! more! i really do n i know i can but god it hurts sm i feel so empty right now all these thoughts r weighing me down s#this too shall pass i'll overcome it n make it through as i always do i have to but it really just hurts so much right now i'm sorry#i wish these serene moments wld last forever. even if it's just the silence n. apollo looks happy rn i wna protect that for everyone i love#i have to. hold on. do better. it's hard but it's really the little things that give me so much hope :< i remember n feel n think too keenl#wish i cld at least cry in someone's embrace at least! or be the one to hold another! i would. like that. someday.. 🥹#i have stuff to do i can't waste my time w writing like this rn#i have an assignment due soon n i'm very nearly done with it. it's just math. ez. i'm procrastinating w that n my ones for tmrrw but ez#i'll finish my assignment for today n finish my lunch asap bcs it is halfway to 9 pm (that sounds so bad oh dear)#i shouldn't have napped or something T_T bcs i wasn't sleepy at all this morning but after class i lied down for a bit n slept#oversharing on tumblr again smh i really need to stop! this is how i always am when writing :<#if i'm really free w writing hten there's rlly no end to my words n thoughts. subconsciously end up oft restraining myself in convos#w others but if i'm talking or writing to myself like this oh certainly it probably gets too much now bcs there's no balance but oh well#i want to slowly be more active again w playing ffxiv even if it's just dailies! :c & until the 28th this month i'll prepare more for the f#i want to put an intro in my current fc discord. make one friend at least before i leave. maybe if i have enough time i cld even join#that other one? just for a bit. n i wna play more nier automata .start replicant. n oh i need more storage space for shadow of the colossus#speaking of writing earlier i wna finish that letter fr before the 14th ends. 7k words n it's not yet enough for me#n a lot more things i wna organize. recently life feels like it's spiraling beyond my control n i'm uncertain of even my own self#or maybe i'm just being v dramatic recently bcs my lack of sleep n i'm crying after all n stressed surely it isn't too much#i'm often lost in my head but simultaneously aware of reality n rn i'm just so so confused w everything :<#none of this none of my vents ever happened. i never wrote these words. forget them or smth. it's just overwhelming n i feel lost rn but#surely it's not too much i can handle this i'm fine! i'll be fine i need to get this done or wtvr then i'll be back to my normal self.#i wish i cld. do more to help someway somehow in this world. for others. for you. but. i hate it i'm sorry i can't seem to do anything rn#it feels so empty. i know i'll make it through but it feels so lonely n trying to have better things for myself feels too unreal it hurts#last thought for now fuck all the times i've been made to be insecure of being myself. sometimes i even get afraid of being kind#fuck it hurts remembering some times. i feel so invisible. like i'm not real. i.... i want to hide n disappear somewhere for a while T_T#part of me says i underestimate too much what i mean to others but. i'm sorry.. to everyone. yh doing what i can isn't enough i#need to do sm more n be sm better fuck my thoughts r so overwhelming what will it take for me to feel once more like i can belong#in this world. longing is painful. i long to feel like i'm real like i'm human too n surely my existence must be capable of being part of#one's reality other than my own yh? surely i can be perceived n thought of the same way i do for others. surely i'm not alone in this world#oh. there. it's the persisting problem i've had for most of my life. fuck loneliness i don't understand
3 notes
·
View notes